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Writer's pictureLaura Duggal

Tips for How to Think About Your Career Goals When You Become a Parent

Coming back to work and re-engaging with your career after having a baby can be a tumultuous experience. Many women feel torn between wanting to be present and available for their child(ren), and the desire to ‘get back to normal’ and re-connect with their job. The difficulty emerges when parents return to work and expect themselves to be able to bounce back and perform to the same level as before – without making any changes to the way in which they work. 



The reality is that becoming a parent is a critical life transition – everything changes, and the impact of this change ripples out into every aspect of your life. It prompts a re-evaluation of your values and your priorities. It can also bring about a shift in how you see your career. It isn’t always clear cut, and it can be a bumpy road as you gradually adjust to being a working parent.  


In this article, the author highlights how becoming a parent has prompted her to find fulfillment in ways that are not connected to her work. Her identity changed after becoming a parent, and this meant that what was important to her also changed. 


Yet, I see many women in my coaching practice who are driven and ambitious and committed to picking up their career where they left off. Excited about immersing themselves in their work and the challenges it presents, they put 110% into their work and expect themselves to be the best parent they can possibly be. It’s a tough call. 


Setting career goals after becoming a parent 


Stop and reflect

Take a few quiet moments to pause and reflect on what has changed for you since becoming a parent: 


  • What is important to me? 

  • Why is it important to me? 

  • What do I really care about? 

  • What really matters to me? 


Look back at your career so far

Allow yourself to look back at what you have already accomplished career-wise. Acknowledge how much you have already gained in terms of knowledge, skills and experience. 


Look ahead at your future

Note down your age today. Ask yourself when you think you might retire. Calculate how many years you have ahead of you to grow and develop your career. It is possible that you have tens of years ahead of you – in which case, you have time... 


Set a short-term goal

Choose a short amount of time, between 3 or 5 years ahead. Ask yourself where you would like to be at that time in your life. Allow yourself to think about what you would like to be doing professionally and also factor in the ages of your child(ren) at that time. As they get older, their needs change. This can impact on you and your relationship with your job.

 

Look at the steps to achieve your goals

If you break down your 3- or 5-year goal into smaller actionable steps, what are they? Is there a particular skill or specialist knowledge you will need to develop? Do you want to acquire a new qualification? Perhaps you will benefit from gaining experience in a particular area? 


Allow yourself some space to breathe

It is very tempting to want to dive in, work hard, catch up and feel the need to prove yourself when you return to work. Slow down a moment. Recognise that a lot has changed for you. It takes time to find your feet and adjust to the changes. Allowing yourself some space to settle into life as a working parent is ok. You have time ahead of you. Slowing down now, to speed up later can be a valuable strategy. 


If you’d like some support with thinking through your career goals after becoming a parent, please get in touch.


My colleague Sarah Turner and I have been busy creating content highlighting the importance of organisations providing support for working parents. As part of this, we created this video series exploring the entire journey of maternity leave, from before the leave starts, through to preparing to return and then the first few months back at work. If you or your organisation would like to understand more about how to support your employees as they take parental leave, please get in touch.  


This blog post is a collaboration between Maternity Coaches Laura Duggal and Sarah Turner. They are working together, sharing their experiences and bringing the best of their joint advice and knowledge to you.

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